I Like My Coffee Strong and My Men Stronger

on Thursday, 25 April 2013. Posted in Sugar and Spice

I Like My Coffee Strong and My Men Stronger

Yes that's right, I am a two teaspoons of coffee to a single cup kinda girl, and not a subtle 'elegant' flavour, but the most intense variety you can get - the sort of smack you in the face kind of coffee, and whilst I'm not a fan of the 'smack you in the face' kind of men, masculinity is definitely a trait I find attractive in our male counterparts.

So what is this 'strength' that I'm referring to. Of course there is the obvious interpretation of physical strength; the muscles, the biceps, the body, the sweat. But that's not what we're really ogling is it... Okay, maybe there are the odd moments of exception, like Josh Duhamel chopping wood in Win A Date With Tad Hamilton! (Yes I unashamedly watched that teen-movie not too long ago and have no regrets about seeing such a fine specimen in his element). However, despite what you might think, our admiration is not of the body itself, but the demonstration of brute and brawn, and everything that differentiates the male physique from the female. We appreciate the strength not because we get to perv (although that is admittedly a nice by-product) but because it makes us feel more feminine.

Why it's in our DNA, it is why our bodies, both male and female, are physically the way they are, because as women - and I may be attempting to speak on behalf of us here, but I like to think my opinion will be shared - we like to feel like women. This is why even when we could get that jar open ourselves, be it running under hot water or dangerously knifing it off with a Crocodile Dundee blade, we instead turn to the male of the household - because it makes us feel girly. Let us take a moment to consider Tom Cruise. How do you think he managed to maintain relationships with not one, but three women who are taller than him? Surely part of feeling womanly is by being with a man who has a greater physical build than our self? Sure this is the easier answer, most women would feel feminine next to the likes of Arnold Schwarzenegger in his hey-day, but there's a better answer than that... Tom Cruise has masculine characteristics. And I revisit my earlier point - it is these characteristics that we ogle, not the physicality itself. 

Let me give you another example: Daniel Craig, and let's add, oh I don't know, how about the scene when he emerges from the water in those tight boy-short swimmers in Casino Royale. Yes, his body does look good, but putting that aside for a moment (yes ladies, you can revisit it later), he isn't exactly a stereotypically good looking guy, don't get me wrong, I find him attractive, but if you were to describe his looks on paper it probably wouldn't have you generating the same sort of lust. Why? Because just like Bond himself, it is the characteristics and masculine traits he represents, that makes our bosoms heave and our loins girdle.

Which brings me on to another point - romance novels. It's exactly like the rogue characters that exist in practically every Mills and Boon novel, and seeing this is apparently become a forum for confession, I shall also admit that yes, I am guilty of indulging in these repetitious tales of arrogant cavaliers and fawning damsels in distress, but this is my point! It is these manly characteristics that we find so desirable. And it is these traits that become the 'dominant' traits - they override, what could be seen as negative, attributes, like how cocky and arrogance can so often seem sexy, and practically anytime a man is gentlemanly it discounts his sexist anecdotes or patronising responses to questions. For you see, there is something about being called a 'lady' as opposed to a babe, girl or chick, and for whatever reason, it makes us swoon.

I know what you're thinking... or at least I know what I'm thinking as I near the end of this reflection - what does it all mean?! Well, I suppose it simply means that perhaps the thinking that personality trumps looks has some merit, but more than that, perhaps the age of chivalry is not lost... it just manifests itself in different ways and we love it just as much as ever.

Now I'm sure I have a jar in the cupboard I need opened...

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